A Parody on Confucius Said

Another year of hard work studying Chinese is coming to a close. I thought we could get a taste of classical Chinese and have some fun as well.

As you know, Confucius is the most respected world-renowned ancient Chinese philosopher/teacher. He was born in the Shandong Provide of China in 551 BCE. He served as an adviser to various state governments, had many worthy disciples and a huge following among the elites as well as the common people. His teachings emphasized proper social relationships, the acquisition of knowledge, and the importance of moral values, such as justice, kindness and sincerity.

Not to be confused with “confusion”, “Confucius” is the Roman literalization of 孔夫子 (Kǒng fūzǐ Master Kong), where 孔 (Kǒng) is his surname, and 夫子 (fūzǐ) means a master or a scholar. 孔子 (Kǒngzǐ) is simply the short form of 孔夫子 (Kǒng fūzǐ).

After Confucius died, his disciples and followers wrote down his teachings and remarks in a book called 论语 (Lúnyǔ), which is referred to in English as the Analects of Confucius, or simply the Analects. Throughout the Analects, you will see the expression “子曰 (Zǐ yuē)”, which means “Confucius said”. Please note that the 曰 (yuē) character is wider than the 日 (rì day or the sun) character. The 曰 (yuē) character is not used in present-day Chinese.

As Confucius was regarded as a sage, people listened to and took note of everything that he said. In fact, one of his sayings is akin to the Golden Rule valued in the western culture:

子曰: “己所不欲勿施予人.”
Zǐ yuē: “Jǐ suǒ bù yù wù shī yǔ rén.”
Master Kong said, “Don’t do to others what you don’t want others to do to you.”

Another example is his general advice to the rulers of that time:

子曰: “导千乘之国，
Zǐ yuē: “Dǎo qiān chéng zhī guó,
Master Kong said, “To govern a country of a thousand chariots,

敬事而信
jìng shì ér xìn,
one must attend to the state affairs earnestly and be trustworthy,

节用而爱人，
jié yòng ér àirén,
be prudent with expenses and love the people,

使民以时.”
shǐ mín yǐ shí.”
and call for the people’s service at the proper time.
(Namely, not in conflice with their farm work.)

See how concise and terse written classical Chinese is in comparison with modern Chinese and English?

Among the disciples who closely followed Confucius, there were a few favorites, one of whom was 顏回 (Yán huí). One day, Confucius sighed and blurted out the following in praise of 顏回 (Yán huí), whom he referred to by the first name 回 (Huí).

子曰: “贤哉, 回也!
Zǐ yuē: “Xiánzāi, Huí yě!
Master Kong said, “How virtuous Hui is!

一箪食, 一瓢饮,
Yī dān shí, yī piáo yǐn, zài lòuxiàng.
He only has one bowl of rice to eat and one ladle of water to drink (for a meal);

在陋巷.
zài lòuxiàng
and he lives in a back alley.

人不堪其忧,
Rén bùkān qí yōu,
Other people would find the sorrow (of such poverty) unbearable,

回也不改其乐.
Huí yě bù gǎi qí lè.
yet Hui does not change his happy attitude.

贤哉, 回也!”
Xiánzāi, Huí yě!
How virtuous Hui is!”

As a Chinese saying goes, 知足常乐 (zhī zú cháng lè), i.e. happiness lies in contentment. 顏回 (Yán huí) was a paragon of this virtue.

I studied the Analects of Confucius at high school, and when I mentioned this part to my father, it reminded him of a parody that he once heard uttered in the Shandong dialect. It goes like this:

回儿也! 回儿也!
Huí er yě! Huí er yě!
Hui my boy! Hui my boy!

你真是个好人儿也!
Nǐ zhēnshi gè hǎorén er yě!
You are truly such a good person!

你用篮子吃饭, 瓢儿喝水.
Nǐ yòng lánzi chīfàn, piáo er hē shuǐ.
You eat from a basket and drink from a ladle.

三间破房没大门.
Sān jiān pò fáng méi dàmén.
Your three shabby rooms have no main door.

人家都为你掉眼泪儿.
Rénjiā dōu wèi nǐ diào yǎnlèi er,
Everyone sheds tears for you,

你还说: “没事, 没事.”
nǐ hái shuō méishì, méishì.”
but you still say, “No problem, no problem.”

As you may know, the Shandong dialect, like the dialect of many other Chinee provinces, sounds quite different from Mandarin Chinese. Click here if you would like to listen to my mimicking this parody in the Shandong dialet. For the fun of it, I also tried it in the Taiwanese dialect. Would you like to do it in your own language or dialect? Have a good laugh.

Sneezing in Chinese

Excuse me! In this part of the world, flu viruses appear to thrive in the months from November to April. We will take this opportunity to look at a few Chinese words associated with the ENT (Ear Nose Throat) department, namely 耳鼻喉科 (ěrbí hóu kē).

The Chinese word for ears is 耳朵 (ěrduǒ). Earlobes are called 耳垂 (ěrchuí). That’s where some women attach their earrings, or 耳环 (ěrhuán).

Very loud noises can damage one’s hearing.

他的耳朵聋了.
Tā de ěrduǒ lóngle.
His ears are deaf.

High-pitched noises irritate the nerves; they are annoying and could be maddening. When such noises come from inside the head, they are a symptom of tinnitus, or 耳鸣 (ěrmíng).
The idiomatic expression 隔墙有耳 (géqiángyǒu’ěr) means walls have ears.

充耳不闻 (chōng’ěrbùwén) means turning a deaf ear to.

耳边风 (ěrbiānfēng) is unheeded advice, like wind passing by one’s ears.

她把我的劝告当做耳边风.
Tā bǎ wǒ de quàngào dàngzuò ěrbiānfēng.
She ignored my advice.

The Chinese word fo nose is 鼻 (bí), or 鼻子 (bízi).

大象的鼻子很长.
Dà xiàng de bízi hěn zhǎng.
An elephant’s trunk is very long.

鼻涕 (bítì) means snot. 鼻塞 (bísāi) means having a stuffy nose.

流 (liú) means a flow or to flow. It indicates motion of some fluid. Therefore, 流鼻涕 (liú bítì) means having a runny nose, 流鼻血 (liú bíxiě) is to have a nosebleed, 流泪 (liúlèi) is to weep, and 流口水 (liú kǒushuǐ) is to salivate.

鼻孔 (bíkǒng) are nostrils. If we say that two people exhale through one and the same nostril, we mean that they side with each other, take the same stance and are of exactly the same mind.

他们两人一个鼻孔出气.
Tāmen liǎng rén yīgè bíkǒng chūqì.
They both sing the same tune.

Sinuses are called 鼻窦 (bídòu). A sinus inflammation is called 鼻窦炎 (bídòu yán). Notice how the word 炎 (yán) is made up of two fire characters?

Hay fever is an allergy caused by pollen or dust. It’s called 干草热 (gāncǎo rè) or花粉热 (huāfěn rè) in Chinese. The eyes, ears and throat may feel itchy; one sneezes and may also have a runny nose. No matter what it sounds like, “achoo”, “hachooo”, or “ech”, a sneeze is part of a universal body language that everyone understands. The Chinese word for a sneeze is 喷嚏 (pēntì). To sneeze is 打喷嚏 (dǎ pēntì). The expression corresponding to “Bless you.” is 百岁 (bǎisuì), i.e. wishing a long life to the sneezer. The sneezers are customarily not expected to say anything to excuse themselves.

他接连打了很多次喷嚏.
Tā jiēlián dǎle hěnduō cì pēntì.
He sneezed many times in succession.

As shown in Chapter 14 of “Learn Chinese through Songs and Rhymes“, 打 (dǎ hit or beat) also serves as the verb “to do”.

The Chinese word for the throat is 喉 (hóu) or 喉咙 (hóulóng). 歌喉 (gēhóu) means singing voice.

她有很好的歌喉.
Tā yǒu hěn hǎo de gēhóu
She has a good voice.

The tonsil is called 扁桃体 (biǎntáotǐ). Therefore, 扁桃体炎 (biǎntáotǐ yán) is inflammation of the toansil, i.e. tonsillitis.

The tongue is called 舌 (shé) or 舌头 (shétou). 口 (kǒu) is the mouth. The Chinese idiom 張口結舌 (zhāngkǒujiéshé) means agape and tongue-tied. You can use it to describe someone who is at a loss for words.

打鼾 (dǎhān) means to snore. When you snore, you are breathing through your mouth and not through your nose. Consequently, you might wake up with a dry and/or sore throat, not to mention that you might suffer from sleep apnea and feel sleepy during the day. Well, there are exercises you could do to strengthen your tongue and throat and reduce or eliminate the snoring. If you would like to try them, click on this link.

By the way, singing provides an excellent opportunity to exercise your tongue and throat, as well as your vocal cords. I suppose singing in Chinese would be a somewhat strenuous exercise, as making some of the sounds requires the use of muscles normally not called upon to speak or sing in another language. You can download the audio files for “Learn Chinese through Songs and Rhymes” to sing along with the loads of simple songs in Chinese.

Chinese words for flattery

On this fine day I took my recently completed flower painting outside to coat it with a clear acrylic spray. Presently, two yellow jackets rushed over to check out the painting. Having found only fake flowers, they flew away in disappointment. Feeling smug, I suddenly remembered that bees and wasps are attracted by strong scents. It was the smell of the acrylic that enticed them, not the beautiful flowers in my painting! I had to tell myself, “別往自己臉上貼金. (Bié wǎng zìjǐ liǎn shàng tiē jīn. Don’t gild your own face with gold foil. In other words, don’t put feathers in your own cap.)”

自己 (zìjǐ) means self. 夸奖 (kuājiǎng) means to praise. Therefore, 自夸 (zìkuā) is to boast. 说大话 (shuō dàhuà) and 夸口 (kuākǒu) also means to boast or to exaggerate one’s own abilities.

自吹自擂 (zìchuīzìléi) is a four-letter phrase that means to sound one’s own horn.

When someone talks tall, his friend might put him down by saying, “吹牛 (chuīniú).” What does blowing a cow have to do with boasting? In ancient times, after a butcher has slaughtered a goat and let the blood out, he would cut a slit in the leg of the goat and blow air into it. He would blow very hard to inflate the goatskin like a baloon. And then, he only had to gently draw the knife across the goatskin to make it split open. It is conceivable for someone to blow a duck (such as for making roasted Peking Duck), a goat or even a pig in this way, but to blow the tough hide of a cow, that would definitely be a tall tale!

称赞 (chēngzàn) and 赞美 (zànměi) both mean to praise. 赞扬 (zànyáng) is to laud or eulogize.

老师称赞学生努力学习.
Lǎoshī chēngzàn xuéshēng nǔlì xuéxí.
The teacher praises the student for working hard.

说好话 (shuō hǎohuà) means to put in a good word for someone.

恭維 (gōngwéi) is to compliment someone. On the other hand, 不敢恭維 (Bù gǎn gōngwéi) means off-putting or leaving much to be desired.

他的舉止令人不敢恭維.
Tā de jǔzhǐ lìng rén bù gǎn gōngwéi.
His manners are underwhelming.

帽 (mào), or 帽子(màozi), is a hat or a cap. 戴高帽子 (dài gāomàozi to wear a high hat) is a colloquial expression for being flattered or being paid a compliment. If someone’s excessive praise makes you feel uncomfortable or undeserving, you could say this in good humor:

别给我戴高帽子.
Bié gěi wǒ dài gāomàozi.
Quit the flattery.

捧 (pěng) is to hold up with both hands. 吹捧 (chuīpěng) means to extol or to tout. You could have guessed that 捧上天 (pěng shàngtiān) means to praise excessively.

There are quite a few Chinese words corresponding to the English word for flattery. Use 奉承 (fèngchéng) when talking about flattering a superior or the rich and powerful. Use 谄媚 (chǎnmèi), 阿谀 (ēyú) or 趋奉 (qūfèng) when describing someone fawning on a higher-up in order to gain favor. In the Chinese historical dramas, there are always one or more characters who are obsequious to the ruler, and who only tell the ruler what he likes to hear, not what is beneficial to the country.

讨好 (tǎohǎo) and 取悦 (qǔyuè) both mean to try to be on someone’s good side or to win someon’s favor. 巴结 (bājié) is to fawn on, which has a negative connotation. Similarly, 逢迎 (féngyíng to ingratiate) has a negative feeling attached to it. A commonly used expression for such actions is 拍马屁 (pāimǎpì pat the horse’s rump), which means to lick someon’s boots.

为了讨好她，他买了一辆全新的汽车。
Wèile tǎohǎo tā, tā mǎile yī liàng quánxīn de qìchē.
In order to please her, he bought a brand new car.

讨好 (tǎohǎo) can also mean to be pleasing.

这张照片更能讨好观众.
Zhè zhāng zhàopiàn gèng néng tǎohǎo guānzhòng.
This photo is more pleasing to the viewer.

Finally, we all know that a modest person would not be fooled by flattery.

谦虚的人不会被阿谀奉承所迷惑.
Qiānxū de rén bù huì bèi ēyú fèngchéng suǒ míhuò.

The Last Rose of Summer paraphrased in Chinese

“The Last Rose” is one of the many world-renowned songs composed by the Irish writer, poet, and lyricist Thomas Moore, who initiated the setting of English poetry to beautiful traditional Irish tunes. Click on this link to watch a wonderful performance of this song by the “Celtic Woman”. If you would like to play this tune on the piano, there is an easy version under “Free Music Sheets” on this blog site.

(Purple Rose)

这一朵夏日最后的玫瑰独自绽开着.
Zhè yī duǒ xià rì zuìhòu de méiguī dúzì zhànkāizhe.
This last rose of summer blooms alone.

它可爱的同伴们都已凋谢枯亡.
Tā kě’ài de tóngbànmen dōu yǐ diāoxiè kū wáng.
Its lovely companions are all withered and gone.

近旁没有任何其他玫瑰花朵, 甚或一个幼小的花蕾,
Jìnpáng méiyǒu rènhé qítā méiguī huāduǒ, shènhuò yīgè yòuxiǎo de huālěi,
There’s no other rose near, or even a young bud,

来与它相互映红或者齐声赞叹.
lái yǔ tā xiānghù yìng hóng huòzhě qí shēng zàntàn.
to reflect each other’s red complexion, or to sigh a praise together.

我不忍心让寂寞的你在枝头上独受煎熬.
Wǒ bù rěnxīn ràng jìmò de nǐ zài zhī tóu shàng dú shòu jiān’áo.
I can’t bear to let the lonesome you suffer alone on the branch.

既然你可爱的同伴们都已睡去,
Jìrán nǐ kě’ài de tóngbànmen dōu yǐ shuì qù,
Since your lovely companions are all asleep,

你也去睡吧!
nǐ yě qù shuì ba!
you go to sleep as well!

我好心地把你的叶子撒在花圃上,
Wǒ hǎoxīn dì bǎ nǐ de yèzi sā zài huāpǔ shàng,
I kindly scatter your leaves over the flowerbed,

覆盖住你和你香消玉殒的花园友伴们.
fùgài zhù nǐ hé nǐ xiāng xiāo yù yǔn de huāyuán yǒu bànmen.
to cover you and your deceased garden companions.

不久我也将如此随你而去.
Bùjiǔ wǒ yě jiàng rúcǐ suí nǐ ér qù.
Soon I will follow you in the same way.

当友谊都已变质,
Dāng yǒuyì dōu yǐ biànzhí,
When friendship has gone sour,

爱情的链圈上的珠宝都已陆续掉落,
àiqíng de liàn quān shàng de zhūbǎo dōu yǐ lùxù diào luò,
the jewels on the chains of love have fallen off one by one,

真诚的心都已凋零, 而喜爱的人也都已离去，
zhēnchéng de xīn dōu yǐ diāolíng, ér xǐ’ài de rén yě dū yǐ lí qù,
true hearts have withered, and loved ones have all left,

啊, 谁会愿意独自留在这苍凉的世界上?
a, shéi huì yuànyì dúzì liú zài zhè cāngliáng de shìjiè shàng?
ah, who would want to remain in this desolate world alone?

I hope this poem has not gotten you into a depressed mood by making you learn these sorrowful words:

独自 (dúzì) means alone or by oneself.
寂寞 (jìmò) means being lonesome or lonely.
凋谢 (diāoxiè) means to wither and fall.
凋零(diāolíng) is to wither and be scattered about.
枯亡 (kū wáng) is to wither and die.
煎熬 (jiān’áo) is to torment (such as being fried or cooked in a pan).
离去 (lí qù) is to leave or depart.
香消玉殒 (xiāng xiāo yù yǔn) is an idiom that translates verbatim to: “The fragrance has disappeared and the jade is gone”. It is used to refer to the demise of an elegant woman.
苍凉的 (cāngliáng) means bleak or desolate.

As an antidote to the sad mood, please click on this link to listen to the joyful song called “Hukilau”.

And better yet, if you feel like it, watch this video to learn the hula dance to this song.

Last but not least, get a copy of “Learn Chinee through Songs and Rhymes” and download the associated audio files to learn Chinese and enjoy singing at the same time.

The Chinese word radical “walk”

In ancient times, before the various types of vehicles were invented, people used to walk on foot to get to places (unless they own a beast of burden). In China, when there was a wedding or a funeral, friends and relatives from other villages might walk days in order to attend. Therefore, it was customary for a well-to-do host to board and feed them for several days.

Now that we have cars to ride in, should you still need to walk somewhere for some reason, you could say in jest that you are taking the Route 11 bus, i.e. “坐11路公车 (zuò 11 lù gōngchē), because your two legs form the shape of the number 11.

The Chinese word for walking is 走 (zǒu). This character also serves as a radical in a number of other characters, such as the following.

起 (qǐ) is to rise.

他每天7点起床.
Tā měitiān qī diǎn qǐchuáng.
He gets up at 7 every day.

趟 (tāng) in the first tone is a verb that means to wade through (e.g. a small stream).

趟 (tàng) in the forth tone is a measure of trips, such as in

我去那儿一趟, 看看发生了什么事.
Wǒ qù nà’er yī tàng, kàn kàn fāshēngle shénme shì.
I will make a trip there to see what’s going on.

趣 (qù) means interest.

这很有趣.
Zhè hěn yǒuqù.
This is interesting.

越 (yuè) is to cross or pass over. The phrase 翻山越岭 (fān shānyuè lǐng) means to climb over the mountains.

趁 (chèn) is to take advantage of a situation or opportunity.

趁你还年轻, 努力工作.
Chèn nǐ hái niánqīng, nǔlì gōngzuò.
Work hard while you are still young.

超 (chāo) is to overtake or surpass. 超速行驶 (chāosù xíngshǐ) means speeding.

赶 (gǎn) has multiple meanings. 赶快 (gǎnkuài) means to hurry up. 赶走 (gǎn zǒu) is to drive away. 赶上 (gǎn shàng) means to catch up.

赴 (fù) means to go somewhere or to attend some meeting or event. 赴约 (fùyuē) is to keep an appointment.

徒 (tú) as an adverb means only or in vain. 徒步 (túbù) means to walk on foot. 学徒 (xuétú) is an apprentice.

There are three other word radicals that are associated with walking. 廴 (yǐn) is a long walk. 辶 (chuò) means to stop and go. It is the same as 辵 (chuò), which appears only in ancient scripts.

Please do not confuse 廴 (yǐn) with 辶(chuò). These two radicals are not interchangeable.

The following words contain the 廴 (yǐn) radical, with the left side extending past the bottom stroke:

建 (jiàn) is to establish or to construct.

廷 (íng) is a court of a monarchical government. 庭院 (tíngyuàn) is a courtyard.

延 (yán) is to extend or delay.

Notice how 廷 (íng) and 延 (yán) look very similar to each other? Yes, one little stroke can make a world of difference in meaning.

The following words use the 辶(chuò) radical, which features a tick at the top.

运 (yùn) could mean transportation, as in 运输 (yùnshū), or fate, as in 命运 (mìngyùn).

迷 (mí) means to be confused, such as in 迷糊 (míhú). 迷路 (mílù) is to get lost. 迷信 (míxìn) is superstition or being superstitious.

送 (sòng) is to give to, to deliver or to see someone off.

逆 (nì) means adverse or inverse.

在逆境中我们应该有勇气.
Zài nìjìng zhōng wǒmen yīnggāi yǒu yǒngqì.
In adversity we should have courage.